OMAAT reader Paul pointed me to a hotel review that kind of cracked me up, and I imagine others will get a kick out of it as well…
Marriott didn’t provide “privacy and safety to be intimate”
Kananaskis Mountain Lodge is a Marriott Autograph Collection property in Alberta, Canada. Marriott’s website and app let Bonvoy members share reviews of their stays, which is generally a useful feature. As you’d expect, we’re all looking for different things from hotel experiences, and reviews reflect that
That brings us to this review, which was published several days ago, by the username “Sad Couple,” and a rating of two of five stars:
A Great Family-Friendly Resort not Suitable for Couples
We arrived at 3:45 pm and were notified that our room was currently being cleaned and that the room would be available at 4:30 pm and it was. As a Gold-Elite member, I requested a room a few doors down from any families as we were celebrating our 15th wedding anniversary, but none were available. The kids next door told us “we can hear you” while my wife and I were being intimate even though we were quiet, which led us to believe that the walls were fairly thin. Nonetheless, we realized that we weren’t going to have the privacy and safety to be intimate while staying there. There were no complimentary waters in our room and we had trees for a view. When we offered this feedback to the front desk manager (Jero) we were told that he “hopes to have the chance to serve us again under better circumstances.” This is a good family-friendly resort but I can’t recommend it for a couples stay. The food at Forte was the highlight of our stay but that is the only thing that was overly positive.
I sympathize with these issues, but am still amused
I don’t want to dismiss the substance of this review, because I think there are some valid complaints (I assume this is all serious, and not a joke?). But it’s somehow the totality and order of the complaints that can’t help but make this sort of amusing:
- Check-in time is 4PM, so having to wait until 4:30PM for check-in isn’t ideal (but it does happen)
- I can’t help but wonder how the initial request was made for a room away from families; did this person literally explain they were celebrating their 15th anniversary, and therefore wanted to be away from families?
- If kids in a room next door really said “we can hear you” while they were being “quiet,” that’s mighty awkward; I do feel like claiming they “weren’t going to have the privacy and safety to be intimate while staying here” might be a bit of a stretch, though
- Then I love how the next sentence is about a lack of complimentary water, plus a view of trees (that doesn’t necessarily sound like a bad view?)
- I just have to know, when the feedback was shared with the front office manager at check-out, did they really explain everything? I mean, if so, good for them…
To be constructive here:
- Maybe there just weren’t any other rooms available, but if poor sound insulation was an issue, I would’ve complained more directly while on property, in hopes of finding a solution, like a room without a connecting door
- Yes, if you’re celebrating your 15th anniversary and are looking for a “romantic” time, a family friendly hotel with a water park might not be the ideal locale
Bottom line
A Marriott Bonvoy Gold member had an unpleasant stay at a Marriott Autograph Collection property, while celebrating a 15th anniversary. The primary complaint is that the hotel had poor sound insulation, so while the couple was intimate, the kids next door told them “we can hear you,” which meant they “weren’t going to have the privacy and safety to be intimate while staying here.”
Honestly, poor sound insulation at hotels is outrageously frustrating, because it typically comes from cutting corners on construction costs. There’s such a difference between a room where you hear nothing, vs. one where you hear everything going on in the room next door, in the hallway, etc.
What do you make of this Marriott complaint?